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Voices From the Workshops: Bill Zagat

December 7, 2011 | Dawn | Comments (0)

Collage by Bill Zagat

It’s a cool place.  The renovation’s taking, like, for-ever, but except for that—oh, and except for the crappy photocopiers…I have a favourite machine I got dibs on.  Well, not dibs, just it’s better than most and rarely jams.  I like doing collages, you know, so I’m always copying a bunch of stuff, then cutting them up at home and assembling them into something new, then scan and upload them onto my blog.  So, anyway, except for some crappy machines, it’s a cool place.  All swirly, you know—the staircases.  Oh, and except for some of the homeless guys—I can live without them hanging about.  I mean, some of them are probably OK—harmless.  May have been like you and me at some point.  Sad.  But you never know what bugs they’re carrying.  I absolutely hate bugs.  See those plastic thingies under those cushy chairs over there—that their legs fit into?  I think they’re for bed bugs—yuck!  So except for all that, a cozy quiet corner is way nice.  Quiet, like I never get at home.  Big crappy family trying to out-yell each other—ha!  And school—don’t talk to me about school.  Totally bogus.  Here is like…an oasis or something.  No family, no rivals, no one trying to get into your pants—so far, anyway.  All hushed, except for all these minds humming away.  Busy little bees, I guess, eh?  And I guess I’m one of them—one humungous swirly beehive.  Hey, I gotta put that into my blog.  I love my blog—it’s like my lifeline and totally kickass.  What did I just say?—swirly…humungous…bees…zzzzzzzz—ha!


This monologue is reprinted with permission from the author. It was performed at the Toronto Reference Library as part of David Young's Writer-in-Residence workshop program, on November 30, 2011.


Playwright David Young will be blogging in this space from October - November, 2011 as Toronto Reference Library's Playwright-in-Residence.